For the past two days, I have not posted. I considered not posting today either. I am exhausted, not from writing, not from posting, not from most things in my literary life, or even going back to school. I am tired all the time. There could be several reasons for this:
- The dramatic change in my schedule,
- Not getting enough sleep or high-quality sleep.
- Poor diet- Pushing myself too hard with my crazy schedule,
- Lack of exercise,
- Or, you know, the pandemic and lack of social interaction.
The funny thing is I wrote a post that I was going to publish on Saturday but I did not get around to posting it.
Jesse and I technically have two wedding anniversaries: One for the formal civil marriage and another where we actually had a wedding with all our family and friends. So we choose to celebrate both. So our first wedding anniversary is February 13 for no reason other than that was the date available. So we celebrate our anniversary and not Valentine’s day because neither of us is that into romance.
Then yesterday, I was having another rough day, I think partly because we have been having such grey weather, and I have not been consistently taking vitamins. Also, I am waiting on blood test results that might tell me there is an underlying deficiency or something that could explain the fatigue. So there’s that.
Simply put, these past few days, I have not felt like myself and struggled to sit down and write, especially about anthropology. So I may push writing about anthropology for another month or perhaps limit it this month while I get back into the swing of things since I am getting back into reading anthropological texts since I only had one anthropology-focused course last semester.
I don’t know what I will supplement my posts with this month, possibly more confessional-style or personal essay posts. I might throw some productivity/health-related posts in there while I balance out these different areas of my life. I want to take a bit of pressure off myself and not add additional research to my to-do list since I am figuring out my schedule for the new semester.
If we take stock of what I am doing this semester, it looks a bit intense:
- Wake up at 5 every day (I am still committed to this and it seems to be working for me),
- Journaling to keep track of where I am,
- Studying Italian,
- Writing my thesis,
- Finishing the first draft of my book,
- Writing and posting (almost) daily on my website,
- Two anthropology courses,
- Two honors programs,
- Ideally a job.
This is a lot. And this just deals with my professional development. This does not cover my health, relationships, and responsibilities as an individual and part of a family. So in addition to all of these things, I am balancing these other areas of my life. Fortunately, I am reaching the end of my first draft of this book so I will be able to take a bit of a break while I focus on my thesis writing.
I had a great meeting with my thesis advisor on the direction of my project so hopefully soon, I will be moving full-steam ahead on that.
When I think over the list I have up there, I keep telling myself I am doing too much and that must be why I am so tired. But when I sit down to do these things, it does not feel like so much. But we’ll see. I may have to take that step back from my book sooner than expected. But I recently dropped the amount of time I spend on it from an hour to thirty minutes. So that will hopefully help. I will know more by the end of the week.
That being said, I gave myself permission to take the time I needed to rest and forbade myself from doing anything career-oriented yesterday and spent the day reading, relaxing, and playing with Ig.